Thursday, March 26, 2009

Why Getting Lost is Good For You


It’s not hard to get lost. Just go to a new city, park at the airport lot and forget your ticket,

…or step into a new situation.

Take note: There is a difference between being lost, and getting lost.

BEING lost is something that happens TO you, a state that you find yourself in. You can be lost in a good book, or confused with what to do next in a difficult situation.

GETTING lost is a more active state, something you participate in and engage with. Sometimes you choose it, and sometimes you don’t.

What does getting lost do? (Besides scare the spit out of you.) It gives you an opportunity to explore and discover not only a new place, but perhaps a new skill or a new insight too.

Every new environment or situation invites a chance to GET lost. Don’t BE lost, which in a sense is a way of giving up too soon. No one wants to be lost, but it takes courage to get lost.

Try it.

Go explore a new route to a familiar place. Choose a new place to do your grocery shopping. For those truly brave souls (or someone with lots of time on their hands) flip a coin, heads – you go left, tails – you go right, and see where chance takes you.



The physical sensations are what we tend to notice first when we are lost. Heart rate goes up, palms sweat, mouth or throat is dry, and something itches that you can’t reach. It’s ok, don’t panic.

Take a moment and breathe in deep.

What about your awareness of your surroundings? That should increase too. The buildings are all five stories or lower and I can’t see any mountains. There are a lot of white cars in the parking lot. People kiss each other on the cheek in greeting and shake hands.

It’s a good start, keep going.

It’s what you need to tell yourself each time you get lost. It takes a lot of energy to take everything in, to scan high and low for details that might help you find your way. The flight or fight instinct kicks in and actually helps us take in more details than if we “knew” where we were going. (Ever drive to a familiar place with your mind full of thoughts and then when you arrive wonder, “how did I get here?!”)

Life is a journey and although the destination is important, wouldn’t it be more enriching and enjoyable if we actually noticed where we were going and, perhaps more importantly, how we were choosing to get there?



We are all busy with too much to do and too little time to do it. Getting lost is not necessarily efficient use of this precious commodity. However, it may be the best way to hone skills we can use to get things done.

Make a choice to pay attention.

Practice getting lost – choose to engage in exploration and newness.

Observe your surroundings, the people you work closely with, your own body’s messages. Then the whole process of making your way through Life could be more like getting lost, than being lost.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Working with Power - an Integration of Feminine Strength!



I grew up with role models like the “Bionic Woman”, “Wonder Woman” and “Charlie’s Angles.” Strong, powerful women, who were still feminine. They had great hair, dressed well, were physically fit (ok, so the bionic woman had an unnatural advantage), and used their brains in tough situations.

It’s no wonder that when I heard about Working with Power and their tool, the 12 Elements of Power, I was hooked. Finally, here was a way of re-defining my feminine energies into strong tools for work and life. It’s a concept that once I heard it made me say, “duh!” It’s like looking at snowflakes and then realizing together they can turn into something very powerful. Glaciers move slow, but they shape the land underneath them, moving house-sized boulders and depositing them into fields where nothing else exists for miles.



The 12 Elements have that kind of power, only on a human scale.

Like most good solutions, it draws on the strengths already present in a person, and requires that you pay attention to both sides of an equation. The 12 Elements of Power framework encourages integration, balance, and incremental change.

Yup – it requires work. No magic pill, no recipe with dos and don’ts.

The development of self-awareness and then practice, practice, practice.

The two creators of this way of working (of thinking!), Sara Harvey Yao and Michele Lisenbury Christensen, developed this tool because as professional women they felt there had to be another way to work in which they could stay passionate, strong, and focused on their work, yet enjoy their families too. They realized that they were at their most effective when they integrated their feminine approaches, like asking for help or nurturing someone, with the more masculine, like taking control and providing solutions.

Their motto is “Working with Power: It’s easier” for a reason.

Well, maybe it’s not easy in the beginning, as no learning process truly is. However, in the long run, which is the WHOLE point, it is easier and more lasting, to work in a way that balances your strengths.

It’s an idea whose time has come. And I am spreading the word.

If you’ll be in the Durham, North Carolina area, near the Arrowhead Inn on Sunday, April 5th, then treat yourself to an experience. I will be offering a workshop with my twin sister (Getting curious? That’s the idea!), where we will introduce the 12 Elements of Power as one of our many tools and give you a chance to practice.

I can’t guarantee you’ll leave with the ability to move huge boulders or leap tall buildings with a single bound, but I can promise you’ll experience something mind-opening, re-energizing, and joyful.

To find out more go to www.theintentionalway.com to find out more and register.

But you better hurry – we only have room for 15 special women!